Pedestrians!

Dear Gretchen,
I am a new driver and after I carefully pulled out of my parking space in the Safeway parking lot, I had to slam on my brakes because an old lady tried to cross the street to get into the store. I laid on my horn to try to communicate to her that I needed to get somewhere, but she took her sweet time and shuffled across the road with her sad little cane. How can I better communicate my rage to clueless pedestrians when I'm driving? I'm also upset at the teacher who was in the front passenger seat of my car who told me that I couldn't honk at old people.

-Speed Racer


Dear Racer,

When I first heard this story, I wondered how you hadn't started a riot right there in the parking lot of Safeway. Here's a driver's training tip for you; people who are walking around in parking lots/streets (aka known as "pedestrians") are the bosses of the road and you have to answer to them. I know, it doesn't seem fair. After all, you are made powerful by your big machine that you are driving and could easily mow them all down. Unfortunately, the minimum punishment by law for a hit and run crime is being sent to jail for a year or being fined up to $10,000. So don't be a jerk. Next time you see an old lady crossing the street, get out and help her across. Don't be like this guy: